Am I In My Party Phase?

Where have I been?

Well, funny story. I’ve been completely in senioritis, busy with school, starting that new job, oh and going out every single weekend. Both nights. 

Let's start with school. Really nothing crazy here, I’ve been taking a lax approach to this semester. I have two big papers due at the end of the semester, and I finally have the bigger one done. I just got it done today, approximately um well a month after the date I really wanted it to be. The other paper needs to be 10 pages and I have 2 done. That one I am kind of dreading because none of us really know what to write. I guess we’ll figure it out. That one is about compliance risks associated with private prisons. The one I just finished was about eyewitness misidentification and how courts should embrace the science of memory. Other than that, I just work on a few powerpoints for my TA position and just pay attention in Business Associations. I will say my professor for that class is super creepy. Like today we were talking about how expensive final 4 tickets in March madness are and how he wants to go. He had the first half hour be us searching for the cheapest tickets for him. And he said well I could just sell grades and looked at me and said, “how about $2,000?” To which I said, “Nah I’m broke” and he responded, “Well a D looks great on you” and I said “Goodluck then because I will make that everyone’s problem.” But like what. And he talks about how he's single, on the apps, has money, that he pays attention because he complimented my hair today, and is writing a book. The book is something like “The Joys of M&A” which would take after the joys of life. He said “You know, the joys of life: food and sex, right? Wouldn’t you agree? Are those the joys of life to you? Well, that’s at least what they say.” I don’t know, I just want to be done with that class, there’s only 5 of us in there so you have to let it go and pretend he didn’t say those things because it's too awkward. But that’s about it. I really am loving my compliance course though. We talk to a different professional in the compliance space every week and I think it's my place in life. Compliance is maintaining the regulatory rules of ethics within the business space. You reach so many different aspects of business and legal matters and I love that. Here’s to hoping I can land a compliance job.

As far as work goes, it's okay. The most exciting thing I have done thus far is draft a motion to dismiss. I mostly close out cases, meaning finding the physical file, then checking every piece of paper to make sure there is a copy online, then separate out what needs to be scanned in and what can be trash. After that scan in, name, and organize in an online file. Then figuring out what physical copies need to be kept. It's boring but it's something to do. I think they’re happy with me. Although sometimes it's very hard to tell, they’re very serious people. I feel a bit uneasy there, but I am learning. I know that this experience is important, especially because I was told that I would never be hired anywhere without firm experience on my resume. While I don’t believe that to be fully true, I do believe that you should try everything you can while in school. Outside of school you don’t have time to mess around and feel out what you do and don’t like. So maybe not my dream, but important.

And now the going out part. Let me explain, normally I go out once a week, if that. But lately, I’ve been going out both nights of the weekend. I think it's because I am starting to get really nervous about the bar exam and studying. I know that those three months are truly going to be hell and I’m a bit panicked at the mere thought. I mean there is a lot at stake, and I know there will be no break. So, I think I’m trying to squeeze every last bit of time possible now because otherwise I would feel like I was wasting it. One weekend I went to an interprofessional mixer where its basically an excuse to dress up and drink like a fish, and boy did I. All my friends and I had such a great time and went out to the gay bar after. I wore this short black dress and when I posted it on my Insta story the next day I put it with the song Be Like A Woman from Chris Rainbow and got a crazy amount of likes on it. That felt good. Another time I went out for my friend's birthday. We went to this rooftop bar and I kind of felt like going home early but once I went I had so much fun that I may or may not have gotten home until 6am and then was up for the day at 8am. We met up with my other friend’s boyfriend’s friends. We had so much fun with them and I maybe was caught making out with a man in a dive bar but anyways lol. He was cute but he doesn’t live here so I haven’t seen him since. 

Last weekend I went out to this new bar with friends and when we showed up, it was like everyone and their mother from law school was there. It was super weird and kind of off-putting. I also saw this guy we used to know who hosted trivia nights and had us on his boat last summer. It was nice catching up with him but he’s also a little bit of a creep. He used to somehow be involved with the Jersey Shore cast and wrote a book about it. So I’m sure you could imagine. But very nice. That bar sucked though because there were so many people and you could not get a drink. I finally convinced my group to leave so we went across the street to make a game plan. After finally coming up with the idea to go to this dive bar I love, we started walking and I found this local small brewery place with colorful lights. I made us go in there for their last drink and we danced around for ten minutes with these drunk old strangers and then off we went to Essex the dive bar. When we got there unbeknownst to me, I was standing next to the owner when waiting for our beers, but the good news is that I was telling him how much I loved it. My one girlfriend then found two guys for us to talk to. My guy was fine, but I could tell it wasn’t going to be anything. He just didn’t have the qualities that I look for but fun to talk to. When it was finally time to go my friend decided to take her guy home and my guy thought that meant he could come too. I did have to say to him “Oh no you have to go to your own home...” Oh well. I mean I don’t feel bad; I didn’t want him to come home with me. The next day me and my friend picked up our other friend to go look at a cat someone wanted to adopt. Her guy came with us and honestly, we had a blast. He was super funny and we’re not an easy group. But he told me that his friend was very upset about the night prior which I thought was funny because how could you get mad, like I met you an hour ago? Eventually I went and babysat for a while and then I got a text saying, “what are you doing tn?” and of course I caved. It doesn’t take much to twist my arm lately. So, we went to this place called no fun and truly had a great time. It was a small group of us, and we just danced for hours. That place looked like a small ski lounge, but the outside was really open so I know it would be great in the summer. On the way back we had this super wise Uber driver who talked about dating from a man’s perspective. My friend brought up a guy she knows that was cheated on and decided to stay. The Uber driver told us that there was a difference between a kind guy and a weak guy and many times those lines are mistakenly blurred. He said staying was a sign of weakness and honestly, I agree. You can have a kind man who also is firm about what he will put up with or firm about his moral beliefs. There are sometimes where super nice guys get bulldozed over with the idea that they’re weak because people think you can’t have one without the other. But that’s not true. Overall, the conversation was a nice reminder that although there are bad ones, there are also people just genuinely trying to figure life out. 

So, I guess that’s my life currently. I mean I’m very happy. I love the people I’m investing time in and I think I have a balanced system. I mean of course that meant that I have taken some time away from this, but I promise I’ll be better. Oh, and we celebrated the one-year anniversary of this website!!! Truly, I am very proud I did this and it's really cool to have a journal that is completely unique and maybe helps other people. 

Here’s some pics from my camera roll recently :) 

With love and lightheartedness,

Cici